Fantasy Football - 8: Easy Stretches of Fixtures

Compared to identfying teams that are performing well, it's a pain to identify stretches of appealing fixtures. The coloured indicators for match difficulty that FPL tacked on in 2016-17 don't seem to update with performances.

The charts below use only the EPL data to try and highlight four aspects that one would typically look at when trying to decide transfers. The thresholds, etc. aren't some sort of recommendation. Feel free to change them if some other number makes more sense.

Code and ( usually ) updated charts available here:

Alappuzha, Kerala, India

The Nehru Trophy Boat Race, held in a town* district called Alappuzha ( the -uzha to rhyme with barracuda ) in Kerala, is an early example of things being named after deceased members of the Nehru clan. It conveniently happens on the second Saturday of every August so you can stretch it to Independence Day and get a nice long weekend trip out of it. Although, if you are indeed able to make a long weekend out of Independence Day you are better off going somewhere else. It's an event with history and an integral part of their culture, the locals love it, the author has lived most of his life in landlocked cities, and despite all these things in its favour it didn't impress.

To begin with, it's the naval, pre-Industrial Revolution equivalent of Drag Racing, which is an odd choice of name for a sport which only involves going straight. It's exciting the first time but it soon proceeds on a misdirected journey of self-realisation to become, indeed, a drag. For those interested in the results or the event in general, the entire commentary is in Malayalam and is tough to follow for someone whose exposure to the language is limited to Appangal Embadum plus five more words, three of which are inappropriate even for sports commentary. The exorbitant ticket prices for the front row seats don't seem justified until shortly after the opening ceremony gets over. That is when the area gets invaded by drunk locals, albeit the jolly types, followed by my demoting it to a ripoff because I'm not fond of hanging out with lots of drunk strangers never mind how jolly they are. A much better return on investment can be had by not buying tickets at all and just winging it with the locals to a convenient, if not as good, viewing point near the shore, in the water, or possibly even the ticketed pavilion itself. Even snacks, the universal assuaging device from airlines to large family gatherings, aren't easily available.


Alappuzha

We drove from Bangalore and reached late on the night before the races which meant we effectively had a morning and a few hours in the evening to savour the town. In a nut shell, and it's a shame that coconuts aren't nuts otherwise it would have made for a nice segue, there is a beach, the restaurant on the beach has some great appams, and every restaurant seems to have plenty of sea food and beef. There are no noteworthy sights but there are some noteworthy smells here and there.

Even in God's own country, children are jerks.

Mudigere, Karnataka, India

A three day weekend in Bangalore in the middle of the summer seemed like a good time to head to the hills. The particular hills we chose were located in Mudigere, in the Chikkamaguluru district. We had a home stay for a day and a half so spent the extra day driving around to random spots and staying overnight in a nearby town called Kadur. Kadur, not because it is a touristic destination but because that was only place that had availability in hotels that night. The only memory anyone in the group has of those few hours is of a large Bengali family sounding and acting Bengali in the guest house corridors.

Shetihalli Church

The Shetihalli church is quite a sight from the road. You can take your car off road and drive the 200 odd metres to get right to it. Some French junta built it way back, and later someone built a dam near it which now results in the structure getting partially submerged for a part of the year. Since the Bible doesn't carry the walk on water DIY guide, the devotees had no choice but to abandon it. A more enterprising person could have put up a wire fence between the church and the reservoir, purchased tubes and floats, put up a bar outside which serves drinks in coconut shells, and made it the funnest church in the world. The business model would be called congregators.

A sharp fall from being a magnificent, shining, Gothic structure, to looking like a stale frosted donut.

Sundarbans, West Bengal, India

I visited the Sundarbans for an overnight 24 hours in December, 2015. It is the largest mangrove forest area in the world but, like Bangladeshi people, most of it is in Bangladesh so you only get to see a fraction of it on Indian territory.

Our starting point was a three hour drive from Kolkata over a road surface worthy of being cast as the before model close up in moisturiser advertisements. The multitude of potholes on a relatively quiet highway through rural India might also explain the lack of toilets. A pre-booked houseboat was waiting for our entire group at the port, which we could reach only by wading our way through the waves of people crashing against the shore.

The population density reduced significantly once we were in the water. In a happy coincidence, we spent most of the period between two lunches on the boat, hopping off only for a walk around a nearby village and going through an unusually informative museum. A part of me is now looking forward to a rise in sea levels.

You should consider going if your definition of a holiday includes playing indoor games or vacantly looking into space but you don't want to do it in your house because that sounds like any another weekend. Driven by that criteria, and armed with the knowledge that tiger sightings are extremely rare ( birds are abundant, though ) and that mangrove is not a portmanteau of mango and grove, your retreat should be most enjoyable.

Boats

I was with family and not being the Whistler sorts, I spared my relatives the ignominy of being the muse of my ongoing, self-taught photography training. The choices that remained then were the boats and the water. Water has its qualities, sustaining life, pH 7, etc., but the dirty-green, more or less standing sorts can only capture your interest for two (horizon, reflection of something), maybe three (stuff floating in it, which includes boats) kinds of pictures. You soon find yourself checking WhatsApp, temporarily suppressing the knowledge that all you receive are good morning messages. It's too late in the day for that, and all the senders are on the same boat as you anyway.

Ferry cattle class -
Long boarding queues.
Very little foot space. No arm rests.
Choice of hair in your mouth or armpits around your nose.
But then, on the bright side, no hidden charges or sea port development fees.

Meet the New Boss

I've always felt that the superhero policy of not killing anybody sacrifices pragmatism for nobility. Suspiciously, there is no capital punishment in their world either. If they don’t want to play god then that’s fine but surely they could invite Thor over and let him decide. Character transformation is wistful thinking; Poison Ivy hasn't turned over a new leaf, the idea of a labile Lex Luthor is laughable, and the lip on the Hobgoblin isn’t wobbling. Even basic imprisonment would have kept them in check if they could just stop trying to escape all the time.

Fashion Trends in Time Series

Originally appeared on the Ather Blog.
For those who can't be bothered to go through till the end, these visuals are now available in R in the ggTimeSeries package.


Time Series Data

Any data which has some temporal identity can be considered time series data.

Your internet data consumption every month, tracked over multiple months, would comprise time series data. If you record the distance your car has been driven every week over a long duration then you are creating time series data. Flagging every instance that you used the phrase, ‘So what else is up?’ on a phone call would also make time series data. Time series data, actually, is all around.

Kudremukh, Karnataka, India

Kudremukh is one of the highest peaks in the state of Karnataka. It's called so because it resembles a horse's face which seems unfair considering we still call Sarah Jessica Parker Sarah Jessica Parker. K has nothing to feel bad about because the resemblance belongs to the same group as constellations and north Indian street food on south Indian streets. If you didn't already know which part resembles the horse face, assuming you know what a horse face looks like, you might not even recognise it when you see it.

It is an overnight journey away from Bangalore. The trek itself spans a total of 10 hours, reaches an altitude of about 2000 m, and never really becomes hard. If you're lost, you're likely to find a trail, other trekkers, locals, or your now cranky guide who has been looking for you. You won't be so tired by the end of it that you can't leave for Bangalore straightaway and reach by next morning but our organisers decided to keep us overnight, maybe to help the home stay guy make an extra buck and / or to let us play in the streams the next morning. This meant a Saturday evening making forced conversation, the best part of a Sunday cooped up in a Tempo Traveller, but a glorious Saturday night sleeping under the stars.