The Emperor’s Clothes

Assume AE wasn't talking about flavoured contraceptives.
Image sources - KL, AE

 
Once upon a time, at a historic worldwide convention, all ancient civilisations unanimously agreed that mating dances are lame and prone to misunderstanding. Imagine a situation where, let’s say, a Persian traveller (P) is proposing mating to a South Indian (S). S asks whether P is of the right caste. P misinterprets S’ question as a positive response, even finds it a little sassy, (which is how P likes it) and swoops in. Melee ensues, all because none of parties knew that the South Indian questioning gesture is the same as what most parts of the world use to wish good luck.

Cambodia

The Journey

The trip to Cambodia was initially a part of the Thailand visit until someone realized that while it’s easy to cross into Cambodia from Thailand on road, it’s quite a different story when trying to get back into Thailand with an Indian passport. In a spurt of enthusiasm, and while we were still in Bangkok, a couple of us booked flight tickets from Phnom Penh back to Bangkok, so that we could get a visa on arrival at the airport, and caught the next bus headed towards the border at Aranyaprathet.

A journey that usually takes about five hours took seven with the bus driver having to stop to ask for directions, a local sitting in front of us getting very annoyed at our conversation, an American loudly declaring that he found it odd that people still listen to Guns n’ Roses because he couldn’t recall the lyrics to Knockin’ on Heaven’s Doors (which was originally a Dylan song anyway) and how dubstep’s the real stuff now, and a downpour for the last couple of hours. This culminated in quite a climax which had us squeezing into Cambodia at about 1955 hrs with the immigration office closing at 2000 hrs. The officer at the Thai end clarified that we can reenter Thailand on road, although it remains to be tried, while the officer at the Cambodian end took a 100 Baht bribe because it was almost closing time and he could.

Bangkok, Thailand

We also went to Cambodia during this visit, that post is here

Welcome to this blogpost.

The Journey

Most flights to Bangkok depart too late after dinner and arrive too early for breakfast. The journey isn’t long enough to get any REM sleep nor is it short enough for a power nap. It is also not long enough to watch two movies nor short enough to watch one and not have time left to regret the permanent loss of those two hours. It’s too dark outside to look for interesting sights and inside you’re surrounded by families dressed up for the foreign vacation status they are about to acquire. You don’t even get too many miles out of the whole affair. The good part, as one would expect, is that Thailand seems to not be the sort of place that people want to take babies to.

FIFA 13 Manager Mode For Dummies

The recent retirement of Sir Alex Ferguson and all the transfer market going-ons prompted me to compile what I’ve learnt about a managerial career in FIFA 13. Here is a good idea of what you’re getting into if you’re interested in pursuing a FIFA 13 manager mode career yourself.

(Disclaimer: I'm not a Newcastle fan or supporter.)
(Thanks Hawa, for spotting some bad mental math with the years.)

Once you’re appointed manager all the players start abusing steroids. I suspect this to be the doing of the well intentioned assistant manager; the board has just put a man in charge who hasn’t managed a football club before and not everybody is an AVB or a Mourinho. In fact, the board is probably aware of the going-ons and accordingly renames the stadium as the Pride of Amsterdam or Livestrong Ground. The sponsorship money they get out of it is where all that transfer money comes from every year even if you don’t win anything.

The Time I Was A Social Network Consumer Activist

I had a prepaid datacard from MTS for quite a few months until I began receiving calls about converting to a postpaid connection as I was a 'special' customer. I used one of their lower plans and I'm not sure how exactly I had become a special customer. It wasn't until I had switched to the post-paid connection for a few months that I realised that calling you a special customer is just a polite way of calling you gullible.

I was very dissatisfied with this connection. Most people I know who used MTS had similarly poor experiences and in one case an even worse experience. It took them a long to activate the connection and they charged me for that period despite the fact that I couldn't use the connection. The billing amounts generally seemed off, the customer service was horrendous, and the speeds were a fraction of the upto 3.1 mbps they promise.The decision to move to broadband didn't require much thinking. And that's when this whole episode began.

The Penis Monologues - 2

"The Vagina Monologues is a set of monologues which deal with various aspects of the feminine experience. A recurring theme throughout the piece is the vagina as a tool of female empowerment, and the ultimate embodiment of individuality." - Wiki

I'm all for equal rights, don't get me wrong, but I couldn't help imagine men adopting that tone. This could be part 2 of that series. If you want to find out more about The Vagina Monologues then you can get the full script here or check out the Youtube performances. I recommend headphones and a solitaire game in the background to alt+tab to.

 I asked men if their penis had a favourite musician, who would it be? Favourite movie? Favourite colour? Other favourites? I was hoping people would take these as questions in a mature manner and their answers would provide some insights but all I got was innuendo. Sometimes I hate men myself. Each one thinks he’s a wise guy.

(mouths a rude word)

The Who, Kiss, Prince, James Brown…
The Big Lebowski, Million Dollar Baby, The Artist, Die Hard, Toy Story…
Yellow, red, green…
You Can’t Always Get What You Want, A Little Less Conversation, Knocking on Heaven’s Door, Wish You Were Here, Good Vibrations…